Miscarriage, 2.5 weeks and the pain remainsApril 30, 2009
I keep hoping that the healing process is beginning. I keep hoping that I am getting better and ready to move on. Yet the grief comes in waves like a Tsunami. I am peaceful and then in the middle of reading a book, or a conversation about pizza, I am seized by the powerful emotion and I fear I will drown. I take two steps forward, and then four steps back. I feel that I am tip toeing out of darkness and a dream or a memory drags me back in like a black snake coiled around my throat. When will I heal? Is this what healing feels like? Maybe healing means that you continue to ache and bleed along the way. Maybe with a loss as painful as this the heart never fully recovers.